My Best Nine Instagram Posts, 2017

Two sunrises, two sunsets and a double rainbow are responsible for five of my 2017 "Best Nine" photos on my main Instagram account (@bvarphotos).

It's easy to find out your own most-liked Instagram photos too. Just go to 2017bestnine.com and enter your Instagram ID. "Best" equates to "most liked."

You can even view your most popular posts from 2016 there. In 2016, my Best Nine were all taken in New Jersey, looking into the sun, playing with shadows.

In 2017, I tried to take more photos of people, and of different places, but I only partially succeeded -- thanks to New York. I'll try again in 2018.

Also, despite now owning a real camera (which I take along to meetups with real photographers so I don't feel so out of place), most of these photos were taken with either an iPhone or Droid, and were edited using Google's Snapseed app.

It looks as if I posted the same amount of photos on Instagram in 2017 as in 2016, but the truth is this past year, I started a second Instagram account -- @foundinnj -- to focus on the quirks and wonders of the Garden State. I have a related Tumblr account where I re-post many of these images, along with curated posts about New Jersey from a variety of sources. Here's my Best Nine from that account...

I love Instagram. It's the most stress-free social network -- and in real life I've been delighted to have gotten to know so many people I follow there. I invite you to follow me at either account, and I'll follow back.

Still, my favorite images aren't always the most liked on Instagram. I posted two on December 8 that were especially meaningful to me. I happened to take this one on Belmar Beach on my daughter's birthday in late November. It reminded me of the song "Free as a Bird," which played on the radio as I drove home that day, and I posted it on the anniversary of John Lennon's death...

Then there's this one -- which I actually took a few years ago during my last visit to Notre Dame, my alma mater. December 8 is also a Catholic feast day devoted to Mary, and 32 years ago that evening, with snow falling at this grotto, I asked Nancy to marry me...

December Reviews: In Harm's Way and Smoke Gets in Your Eyes

In Harm's Way: The Sinking of the U.S.S. Indianapolis and the Extraordinary Story of Its Survivors by Doug Stanton
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

The heroism of these survivors is astounding. The research, and love, that went into writing this book is equally so. This is such a maddening tale in so many ways... I can't quite believe that the Navy was so inept and bureaucratic in its delayed response, or that people were so hostile to the captain. I didn't know that trolls existed in the pre-Internet days.

Maybe, like any real-life event, it's hard to know what the real truth is. But I'd be willing to bet this is close to the true history. Also, I thought the first chapter, which occurred on dry land, was the most chilling part of the narrative.

Finally, I feel I MUST give this book 5 stars because it needs to overcome two absurdities that might otherwise make someone not want to read this book. First, almost ALL the negative reviews of this book on Amazon are actually about another book, "In Harm's Way" by Ridley Pearson. Second, the 2016 movie version of this book, "Men of Courage," is perhaps the worst Nicolas Cage movie of all time -- and that's saying something, especially since it wasn't remotely the fault of Cage's acting.


Smoke Gets in Your Eyes: And Other Lessons from the Crematory by Caitlin Doughty
My rating: 3 of 5 stars

Never having read a book by a death celebrity, unless you count Edgar Allan Poe, I really didn't know what to expect. In the end (and this is the most existential statement I've ever made in my life), I expected something more.


View all my Goodreads reviews

When Real Life Meets Social Media

I have a great deal of fun curating a Tumblr site called "Found in New Jersey."

What I particularly like about Tumblr -- just like Instagram, and unlike Twitter or Facebook -- is that it's usually pretty drama-free. Tumblr can be very artistic and self-expressive (also very pornographic), but it's usually a one-way street, where people just "like" stuff and move on.

So when I received a real message from one of my Tumblr connections today, I was jolted back to real life and how different it is from social media.

It was about this column in today's Newark Star-Ledger by Mike Di Ionno: "During Murder Hearing, Father of Victim Counts Blessings."

It's a heart-breaking story. You should read it. My Tumblr connection is a real-life friend of the Tevlins, the family of the murder victim.

All this has nothing to do with social media's tidy and vacant proclamations of "thoughts and prayers." This is real life, so messy and complicated... and often so sad and yet hopeful.

November Reviews: The Boys in the Boat and The Sarah Book

T.S. Eliot was wrong. November, not April, is the cruelest month. Especially if you, like me, happen to be a fan of Notre Dame football.

I’m definitely not a fan of the cold weather, the dying leaves, all the reminders of mortality.

One good thing I have to say about the month is that it provides the perfect backdrop to read or listen to a good book. I gave two a try over the past few weeks. One, I liked unreservedly; the other left me wondering. Which isn’t necessarily a bad thing either, I suppose.. so forgive me, Scott McClanahan, for this lesser mortal's snarky attempt at imitation. Blame it on November.


The Boys in the Boat: Nine Americans and Their Epic Quest for Gold at the 1936 Berlin Olympics by Daniel James Brown
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

Last month I posted on Facebook looking for a book recommendation, and several friends recommended “The Boys in the Boat.”

When I read previews of the book, I wasn’t sure what to expect. It was a long book, about a topic — competitive rowing — in which I had not even an iota of interest. It was a true story, but set more than 80 years ago, and all the people involved in the drama are no longer living. So what did my friends see in this book that I didn’t?

I asked this of myself again and again as I began listening to the audio version recorded by the great Ed Herrmann just a year before his death. I started listening. I stopped. I started listening again.

Gradually, I was pulled into the story — and then I became enthralled.

This is a great book. It’s what story-telling is all about: it enlightens; it entertains; it expands horizons. The writing brings the past — notably, the Great Depression and the Berlin Olympics — back to life, and the research that went into this is astounding. Maybe the story was a little too perfect in the retelling, maybe the life-lessons are a little too pat… but, oh, what a terrific time I had along the way.

I even followed this up by watching the PBS “American Experience” documentary, “The Boys of ‘36.” It was interesting to see real-life footage of the same scenes that appeared in this book. The thing is, the book was even better.


The Sarah Book by Scott McClanahan
My rating: 3 of 5 stars

I have a car. I was listening to this book while driving my car. My wife was with me. “What's that?” she asked. I told her it was an audio book. An audio book called The Sarah Book. My wife said, “It’s an audio book?” “Yes,” I said. “It’s called The Sarah Book.” “It sounds like it’s written by a third-grader,” my wife said. “It isn’t,” I replied. “Well, it’s the way kids in my third-grade class would tell stories,” she said. “Just one thing after another. It’s very repetitive.” “Well,” I replied, “It’s actually a very well-reviewed book. And it’s short. I’m trying to keep an open mind about it. Everyone loves it.” Everyone but my wife.

Then the author continued reading in his mesmerizing drawl. It wasn’t one of the good parts. I had heard some good parts, but this wasn’t one. This part was about an old dog, and I couldn’t tell whether it was supposed to be humorous, pathetic or ironic. Or whether it mattered. I had thought some parts were poetic. Maybe I was wrong. Maybe I was right. Maybe my feelings are just a metaphor for life, and we’re all trapped inside this book review. All of life is just one big book review, and we don’t even know if the author is reliable or not. Did he really take his kids on a joyride while drunk? I don't think we can ever be sure.

So I need you to forgive me. Also, I know I’m using the word “I” a lot. I’m just warning you: if I were you, and I purchased this book, I would get used to it. Anyway, I know that all is lost. Everything we love will be lost. So what does it matter?

View all my Goodreads reviews

One Week in New Jersey

Nine images in black and white, November 2017.

Clockwise from top left: Lambert Castle grounds, Paterson; St. Bonaventure's, Paterson; Lambert Castle; Asbury Park boardwalk; Riviera Maya restaurant, Bogota; Verizon Center, Basking Ridge; El Norte restaurant, Lodi; view of Elmwood Park from Totowa; and (center) Wonder Bar, Asbury Park.

Holy TMP! This Press Release May Save Your Phone

This iPhone is dead, right?

Its screen is cracked; its insides are showing. It's unresponsive.

Well, let me tell you the happy story of how it was brought back to life… because, in the immortal words of Arlo Guthrie, you may know somebody in a similar situation, or you may be in a similar situation.

Here’s how to protect yourself when your phone’s screen (be it iPhone or Android or Windows) is cracked and seemingly beyond repair: Get a mobile device protection plan.

I mean, pardon the commercial interruption, but there’s a great deal on something called Total Mobile Protection (TMP) that Verizon is offering until Nov. 17.

You should really check it out. NOW.

A few weeks ago, I told the story here of how I was tripped up by supernatural forces and landed on my iPhone to break my fall. Sadly, I could not revive the device, so I put it in a drawer and transferred my number to a trusty old Droid. (By the way, despite the fact that I work for Verizon, I'm not automatically given new phones... we make sure all the latest/greatest phones are made available to customers first.)

Then, by coincidence, I happened to see a draft of this press release... the press release...

Phone-saving press release

...by my Seattle-based colleague Scott Charlston. He told me he was arranging screen-repair demos in the New York area with Asurion, a company that provides insurance services for wireless devices, and that Andrew Testa, who works in the same office I do, would be happy to take my phone to see if it could be fixed.

If my phone could be fixed, anybody's phone could be fixed. I had nothing to lose. So I gave my baby to Andrew.

A few days later he tweeted these before and after photos of "Pete from Asurion," who Andrew was evidently holding captive in a suburban garage...

Unbelievably, he fixed it!

Pete from Asurion raised my iPhone from the dead!

I only hope that someday Andrew lets him out of that garage. Pete really deserves so much more than the current $29 TMP deductible.

Here's my iPhone; good as new...

...The home screen is a photo from the Grotto on the Notre Dame campus. There's a story behind that too, but that's for another blog post on another day. Some day after Notre Dame plays Miami later tonight.

Go Irish!

Shameless Self Promotion

A Google Album of Bob in front of step-and-repeat banners

Google Photos is a harsh mistress.

Looking back on my automatically saved photos usually forces me to confront sobering questions about my life choices, like...

Why did I take selfies in front of 21 step-and-repeat banners over the past three years?

I've pondered this question before, and my best defense is simply that it's a harmless and joking way to keep myself entertained at business and charity events.

At least that's what I'd tell strangers. What I'll tell you -- since you've cared enough to read this far -- is that the truth is more complicated.

I unapologetically want to leave a mark on the world... whether it's through my family and work relationships, or through sharing on social media in different ways that will lead to real-life connections or somehow have meaning in someone's life.

So, yes, I'm a shameless self-promoter.

I plan to keep putting stuff out there too because someday, somehow, it may make a difference. Here are 10 places you can find me... if you don't happen to have a step-and-repeat banner handy:

• Right here, where I plan to post more writing and poetry and music in the future (and, I think, even fill out past years with diary entries I've not previously shared).
• On Instagram (my favorite platform), where I have two accounts: a main account, where I post images from everywhere (hello, NYC, my favorite city), and an experimental, slice-of-New-Jersey-life account.
• On Tumblr (my second-favorite platform), where I'm curating "Found in New Jersey," about the quirky land I love.
• On Twitter, where I tweet an awful lot of work stuff (including Verizon news releases and stories from me and my colleagues), but try to keep a sense of humor about it (and of course I follow back, if you're active and not a bot).
• On LinkedIn, where I also post work stuff, and try to keep things a bit more professional and promote others -- and sometimes write original posts related to PR.
• On Facebook, where I share posts publicly when it doesn't impact my family's privacy.
• On Medium, where I re-post things no one ever reads (except for my oft-updated book-review post, which is a compilation of my short Goodreads reviews).
• On The Good Men Project site, where I post things that are well-read and heavily promoted, thanks to the tremendous support of its great editorial team.
• On Pinterest, where I indulge my love of penguins. 
• On Google+, where I post things simply because I feel that Google can otherwise be a vindictive mistress, too. 

A Haunting in New Milford

It’s October; time to get spooky. Do you believe in ghosts?

I do, or want to. There must be more to life than what we can see, and it's comforting to believe in an afterlife.

But only once in my life did I really think I saw a ghost.

Years ago, the 21 Red and Tan commuter bus from New York dropped me off right on River Road by the side of my old, historic house in New Milford, NJ. From the bus stop, I could see my wife in our back bay window. She was reaching up, hanging a flower pot.

Moments later, I was home and in the living room. No one had greeted me at the front door, and I found nothing hanging in the window. All I found was a note in the kitchen from my wife, saying she had taken our two young daughters on a play date and would be late arriving home.

I was more puzzled than frightened. I’ve lived there many years since without any similar incidents, and the back bay window was long ago replaced during a renovation. Still, my daughters swear they sometimes heard “ghost cats” from their bedrooms when they were young. That might be explained by mice or squirrels. I can’t explain what I think I saw with my own eyes.

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So it was with some curiosity that I saw New Milford DPW workers recently install a banner reading “Nightmare on River Road” over the very spot where I once thought I saw a ghost. At first I thought, “I know our fence needs some repairs, but ‘nightmare’ is a little harsh!”

On further review, I realized it was an advertisement for one of New Jersey’s “premiere indoor haunted house attractions,” right in the center of my home town. There’s a a website with further information, a Facebook page (of course) and this news story in the Bergen Record, which gives plenty of details about the 23-room site, open weekends during October.

During the day, I went to check it out for myself before it opened, and a friendly representative of New Milford Boy Scout Troops 78 and 291 invited me in to look around – as long as I didn’t post any photos. The attraction was still in set-up mode – but I was impressed, both by the quality of the project and by the enormous volunteer effort that has made this remarkable Boy Scout fundraiser come to life. Or death.

Despite the warning, I did take a single photo: the one posted at the top of this page... a behind-the-scenes, real-life messy sink. It wasn’t part of the attraction, I rationalized – although it looks like it belongs in a serial killer’s lair.

I was admiring this shot on my cell as soon as I turned to head home… and promptly tripped. I instinctively used my iPhone to break my fall to the concrete. I’m OK, but the screen was shattered.

Somehow, I managed to extract the photo of the sink as a grim reminder – and warning to you -- to always listen to whatever a Boy Scout leader tells you to do, even in matters of the paranormal.

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Aside from the Nightmare on River Road, I know of few other haunted places in New Milford.

The borough is, however, bookended by two sites where people have claimed to see ghosts. One is the old Steuben House at historic New Bridge Landing just over the border on the south side.

I ask you, though, does this room look haunted?

OK, so it does.

Just over the border on the north side of town, there’s also this…

… It’s the abandoned Oradell Water Treatment Plan on the Van Buskirk Island property owned by United Water (formerly the Hackensack Water Company). You can’t tell me that place isn’t haunted.

Finally, just for an October's eve adventure, I drove to another allegedly haunted site a few miles away that for years has attracted attention from the girls (my daughters included) at Holy Angels High School: The Devil’s Tower in Alpine.

According to local legend, if you drive or walk backward around the tower at least three times, you see the ghost of a woman who leapt to her death there. You might also find yourself face-to-face with the devil.

I took these 13 photos of The Devil’s Tower, but I didn’t dare drive or walk backward while there. When it comes to the supernatural, I’m a skeptical believer… not a fool.

Joe Girardi Illustrated 5 Ways Business Leaders Fail -- And 1 Way to Win

Back page of the NY Post the morning after

I grew up a Yankees fan, although these past few years I've really only followed the Mets. My wife is a lifelong Mets fan, and I have come to appreciate and believe Roger Angell's quote from "The Summer Game" that "there is more Met than Yankee" in every one of us.

Still, I like the Yankees -- and they are responsible for some of my life's most vivid memories... watching countless games on TV at home with Dad in Totowa, NJ, and a memorable Aaron Boone home run live in the Bronx with my friend John Bonomo. What's not to like about Aaron Judge or Didi Gregorius or even Joe Girardi?

Well, I found plenty not to like about Joe's managing of Friday night's Game 2 of the ALDS -- and wrote the following and posted it on LinkedIn without even getting out of bed Saturday morning. Since then, on Day 2, Joe has admitted to making errors in judgment during the game, so I'll add a 6th lesson here: Learning from mistakes is a winning strategy. Here's hoping the Yankees recover and win today and tomorrow and again next Wednesday. In the meantime, here's what I posted yesterday:

If and when New York Yankees manager Joe Girardi leaves his career in baseball, he might consider a teaching job at the Harvard Business School. He’d have valuable first-hand lessons to teach on how business leaders can fail:

1. Rely too much on process. Girardi’s post-game “they only us 30 seconds to decide” excuse for not seeking a replay challenge of the ball that allegedly hit Lonnie Chisenhall (and ultimately changed the outcome of last night’s Game 2 of the AL Divisional Playoff between the Yankees and Cleveland Indians) is a classically lame corporate copout. It’s akin to saying “we’ve always done it this way.”
2. Rely on poor metrics. Last night, baseball viewers were informed by cable TV announcers that the Yankees led the league in successful replay challenges (75%). And likely there are Yankees replay staff, responsible for recommending whether the manager should ask for a challenge, who stake their job security and expect a raise this year for producing such an impressive number. The thing is, it’s the wrong number. In fact, if you successfully challenge only 5% of replays – and one of those 5% happens to turn the tide of a playoff game – that’s the only right metric to be concerned about.
3. Don’t seize the moment. OK, Joe, so you do have only a limited amount of time and your replay staff has let you down. What do you do? Nothing, is not the correct answer. (And, here, history repeats itself, because 10 years ago in the playoffs Yankees manager Joe Torre similarly did nothing as his team was literally attacked by a plague of locusts on the same field). Instead, seize the moment. Channel former Baltimore Orioles manager Earl Weaver. I believe Earl would have shot out of the dugout, gotten in the face of the erring umpire, thrown a few things around the infield – and given his 75%-right staff more than 30 seconds to see that Yankees pitcher Chad Green had actually produced an inning-ending strikeout instead of a hit batsman to load the bases.
4. Lack a creative spark. Oh, but Joe later explained, he didn’t want to interrupt Green’s rhythm in that situation by calling for an extended replay review. That proved very wrong. The non-interrupted Green proceeded to surrender a grand slam to Francisco Lindor, the next batter. Perhaps, given that Joe said he knew from his prior experience as a major league catcher that “interrupted rhythm” was a real concern, he could have, with a little creativity, both delayed the game to ensure a proper replay review AND had another pitcher warmed up to replace Green before he faced Lindor. So few people -- and I'll include myself here -- are able to think three moves ahead in the heat of a pressure-packed moment. The people who do are the people who lead business revolutions.
5. Don’t listen to employees. This is the worst offense. Joe’s own on-field captain, catcher Gary Sanchez, clearly motioned to the dugout that the ball had been foul-tipped and caught, rather than hit the batter. Joe, who has recently publicly criticized Sanchez’ defensive skills (another management error), evidently didn’t believe him. What do you think Sanchez’ psyche is like now? Or Green’s? Or Todd Frazier, who Joe later pulled from the game at second base for pinch runner Roland Torreyes... who was promptly picked off, later meekly struck out, and then, having replaced Frazier in the field, allowed Cleveland’s winning ground ball to pass between him and third base on the final play of the game.

All that said, losing in a team sport – and losing in business situations – is always a team effort.

The Daily News' take

Sanchez looked at a third strike with a runner in scoring position, team superstar Aaron Judge didn’t produce a single RBI when it was needed most, and Green DID give up a grand slam. Even external forces produced “headwinds” (corporate jargon alert) that worked against a Yankee victory. Remember, it was home-plate umpire Dan Iassogna who first made the incorrect call on the strikeout – much to the surprise of the batter and catcher. And a New York Post photographer interfered with a play that gave Cleveland an extra base in a crucial spot. And Karma.

Winning is a team effort too. Let’s not forget that Lindor actually hit a grand slam, that catcher Yan Gomes’ cannon arm produced the Torreyes pickoff, that Jay Bruce hit a home run when his team needed it most, and that Gomes also ultimately (unlike so many hitters before him) hit a game-winning RBI in extra innings.

If and when Girardi takes that professorship at Harvard Business School, sign me up. I'm sure Yankees fans only hope it’s a course that's offered in the coming spring semester.

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Read all 28 articles I've posted on LinkedIn, all touching on PR issues. Also, special thanks to my friend Michael Kasdan. He's an editor at The Good Men Project, a website founded in 2009 as a collection of men’s stories about the defining moments in their lives. GMP reposted this yesterday, just as it has so graciously posted some of my other rants.